It's My Life

Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me, I'm in Port Alberni, happy birthday to me.
Yuppers, another year has come and gone in my life. 21 years in total, it's hard to believe. I'm about a quarter into my life now, but I'm being optimistic because 84 would be quite the accomplishment for me, especially with my diet of fast food, junk food and beer. April 29th, 2003 also represents the date my first Alberni Valley articles came out- two of them this morning. Unfortunately you can't check them. Go to www.avtimes.net and you'll see what I mean. Today I had a real surprise at work. In fact I completely froze I was so shocked.

It was just my third day at the Alberni Valley Times and I got a cake at work. I didn't know half the people by name yet, but I got a cake. They went full out too with the birthday singing and a candle on top.
"Never a dull moment in this place," said Rick Methot, the papers manager. Obviously not.

Today also marked the departure of my parents after coming down for a couple days. They came on Sunday and stayed all day yesterday. We went golfing and went to The Clam Basket for dinner. Sure it sounds good, and it looked attractive. However it got a little busier than workers anticipated - our meal came an hour after we ordered it and my salmon wasn't even that great- it was too dry and the seasoning was boring- what a total ripoff! I'm on an island on the Pacific Ocean for crying out loud!!!!! And Port Alberni is the Salmon Capital of Canada! Whoever gave this town this reputation should think twice! Anyhow, to top it off my mom got a meal she never even ordered. She ordered halibut and got chicken! What were they smoking behind the counter? She took the chicken at half off anyways. Things were obviously a little unorganized at the Clam Bucket. A seafood restaurant in Kamloops, 400 kilometers away from the ocean, could do a better job. Ah well, tough break.

Oh right. The golf game. Yeah it was okay, I had a couple of pars. It was my first time out, and that's all I'll say. I could go off on excuses if I want. I wasn't wearing golf shoes, the fairways were wet, there were too many divets, poor management, my clubs suck, it was too windy outside, I was pissed off from the Canucks loss to Minnesota the night before...........you know how it goes.
Anyhow, both the Canucks and Senators won tonight, so chances of an All-Canada NHL final remain legitimate.

Anyhow, I'm off for the night again. Stay tuned for more updates.

Saturday, April 26, 2002

Today marks the second full day I'm in Port Alberni. It's an interesting town of about 20,000 people, most who are at least 40, something I noticed just driving around. It was also my first day at the office, a slack day that involved getting a couple stories for the weekend and a tour of the place. I needed a slack day though. The last few have been a little hectic, and I was exhausted when I arrived here at 11 p.m. on Thursday night. But I still had the energy to slam a beer, a skill I take pride in. But lets rewind a bit here because surely one day can't make a person too exhausted. First of all, I wasn't just tired, I was a little stressed and nervous at the same time too. Stressed from studying for my last exam, and packing up, and nervous about the big job. I'd only heard about the job about 10 days ago, and here I was working already. It was a few days after the Journalism year-end bash, and I heard about the whole thing. My brother send me an e-mail message telling me to "phone mom you fucking clown", an illicit message like that really caught my attention. I phoned her, heard about the job, and it was mine a couple days after that. So I left that Thursday morning, and after that "The Loops" was never going to be the same. Residence will soon be as empty as Joe Louis arena after Red Wings fans learned there wouldn't even be a game five back home. I expect most to be gone by the end of this weekend, unless of course they're obsessed with school and are staying for the summer term. Melissa was off to Medicine Hat for a short stay before going to spend her summer up in Dawson Creek. Meghan is off to Smithers today, and Nick to Langley early next week. I miss you all, and hope you have a great summer! Meghan and Melissa, I felt we've grown really close the last few months despite not really knowing each other first term. Your house was a nice stay the last couple days, aside from the constant smell of oven cleaner. Actually it wasn't that bad. I'll never forget your quote Melissa- "Look at me. I look like I've just got back from the war."- That is a classic. If it makes you feel better, I never thought you looked that bad.
How could a sports junkie like myself not include something about sports. Well, I no longer have a lot to say, my Leafs are out of the playoffs after losing 6-1 to the Flyers on Tuesday in the worst defensive Toronto game ever. This happened the day after I put away my jersey in storage. Ironic isn't it? God bless the Canucks though, and Minnesota for allowing them to pull off the O.T. victory last night. When I was driving through Vancouver on Thursday I saw a white Honda prelude with two Vancouver Canucks flags out each window and a Canucks sign on the rear windshield. Yes, Canuck fever is here in B.C. and I'm cheering them on strong.
Anyways, here's another column you can read and enjoy, or tolerate, or laugh at, or hate, or pretend to like or hate, or get mad at, or fall asleep while reading. You may find these events boring, exciting, histerical, dissapointing, intense..............However ya know what, I don't care what any of you think, and you just waisted 5 minutes of your time reading this bullshit. Have a great day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay okay welcome everyone to inside the mind of "Shallow Al", better known as Al McInnis. I'm also available at sports_junkie@hotmail.com, well not exactly unless you're on my contact list because I've got real strict security settings. I do that in order to prevent myself from going to porno sites, subscribing to books and magazines, getting free samples of anything you could name, ya know stuff like that.
Today has been a pretty slack day, just like a lot of other ones. My biggest accomplishment was going to McDonalds to hand in a letter informing them that I'm leaving by April 27. Pretty sad I know. But we all have those days. I watched the Canucks fall to the Blues on only 14 shots. Still better than their 6-0 embarrasement at home in game 1. My Leafs are up 2-1 so I'm still feeling good. Last weekend was quite the memorable one, and my weekend started on Friday morning.
Friday marked the Year End Journalism Bash. I started drinking at about 12, and called it a night at about 2 a.m. The crazy thing is after 12 hours of drinking and when most were passed out, I felt I could still go for a few. There certainly were a few memorable moments. There were highs and lows, as all year end parties would bring. There was nearly a J-school fight, Heather appeared a little busy with Neal Pobran, the editor-in-chief of the Omega, and there was the continued conflicts between me and Silver. Half the time I don't know why we get in our little scruffles. He just can't take a joke, and I can't stand that sometimes. He continued making he constant references to PG.
"You'd better watch your back in PG. When you walk into a bar, if you even say 'Prince George' you're getting jumped," he said at one point. Well, he was referring to that, probably not in those exact words. I was a little intoxicated at that point.

Saturday, April 12, 2003- My night at the Max with Melissa, Scott and Jason

How long should a trip from Vancouver to Kamloops take? Certainly not 7 hours. That's how long it took Scott, a longtime friend of Melissa White. Melissa had been looking forward to this night, and although she admitted they'd seen more of Kamloops in one day than she ever has, they would finally arrive. After meeting them at the college, me and Meghan chose to walk back rather than get in the car with them. Probably a good call. They'd stopped at every little bar from Vancouver to Kamloops, and were a little shitfaced to say the least. After we met them at home, this Jason guy convinced me to start drinking only because I'm from PG and that makes me hardcore. I did, then four of us went to the bar. I met three good-looking, polite girls and danced a bit. That is until the end of the night.
"Girls are such gold diggers"- I repeated that line a little too much by the end of the night. I woke both Meghan and Shaun up. I still feel a little guilty. I said that because I asked to borrow a couple of cigarettes. I never knew it would take so much abuse to get cigarettes. Ah, well.